Reflection

[ 5 ] September 1, 2011 |
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Summer is nearly over and the Autumn is about to begin. It is my time for reflection. This is the time of year I love. The season is about to change, the kids are going back to school, the world slows down a bit and I start to reminisce about my life and what has happened in the last year. The cooler temperatures, changing leaves and shorter days have always lent themselves to introspection. Sitting near a window, wrapped in a blanket, watching the rain fall…it’s inevitable.

I am also inundated with sense memories.

You know the ones I’m talking about…the memories that slam right into you and bring you back to a moment in time most people have forgotten. Or wish they could forget. The things that trigger these memories in me are sometimes strange.

The theme to a beloved sitcom.

The chill in the air.

A piece of clothing.

An old song.

A smell.

An image.

Autumn leaves.

Getting my daughter ready for school.

A texture.

All of these things can, and have, caused the most visceral memories in me that I sometimes think I am so very different from the rest of the world. I can smell, taste, see and feel that moment as if it were happening for the first time. It’s more than déjà vu. It’s as if I suddenly transported through time back to that very incident.

Doesn’t anyone else have this same kind of reaction?

I’m just odd, I guess.

But this is what Autumn and Winter do to me. I think about what the new year will bring. I make goals. I look forward to Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. I wonder at how fast my daughter is growing up. I fear if I take my eyes off of her, if just for a brief second, I will have missed something important. I ponder redecorating/rearranging/reorganizing my home and decorating for the coming seasons. I also reflect on what I have gone through this past year: friendships forged and lost, family drama avoided or plopped directly in my path, mistakes made, lessons hopefully learned.

I make plans and I promise myself I will not make the same mistakes in the future. Sometimes I  feel doomed to repeat my transgressions, but mostly I am thankful for what I have learned from them. Even when that lesson was a battle within myself and humbling.

 

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Category: Thoughts

About the Author ()

I'm Shan and I 'm the creator of The Asylum and a magnet for The Free Range Stupid™. I'm a little nutty, a lot sarcastic and pretty damn smart. I am also a graphic designer, blog coder, virtual assistant, free lance writer and can whip you up a killer resume, media kit or press release that would make others green with envy. Go to Skewed Design Studios to check out my services. You won't be disappointed.

Comments (5)

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  1. Shan,

    I think a lot people do experience what you talked about to some degree.

    I love fall but for some reason as I get older each and every fall doesn’t live up to my expectations. I have very vivid sense memories of fall from being a kid and I think as an adult my senses have dulled. I look forward to fall because of those memories but it just isn’t the same.

    It makes me kind of sad, but then I remember that my kids are probably experiencing it more fully and it helps.
    Kim @ What’s That Smell? recently posted..I’m never going in my backyard againMy Profile

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