Things The Diva Said…

[ 6 ] December 17, 2008 |
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“Mommy, I’m having a bad hair day.” (I never say that. Not sure where she learned it.)

Mama: Diva, why do you keep ripping the arms & legs off your little dollies & sprinkling them on my bed?

The Diva: Because I don’t like them. So I said “No, no, no.”

Mama: What are you doing? (I had just caught her looking through Daddy’s pile o’newspapers)

The Diva: I’m looking at some cool toys! (Damn you, Toys ‘R’ Us & your Big Toy Book!)

“Mommy? I need a pogo stick. A purple one. With sparkles. So I can bounce. Up. Down. Up. Down. Like that. See? Bong. Bong. Bong.”

“Mommy? Can I fly like a bird? With fur?”

“I am a good helper, Mommy!” (She tries, but yeah, not so much.)

“I love to clean up!” (Oh, how I wish that were true!)

“Oh, don’t worry about my tiny little boo boos, Mommy. They will be just fine. I just need a purple bra. With sparkles.” (UUMM…not sure where to go with this one…)

And so it goes…my kid says the strangest things. She can make me laugh no matter how mad I am. She can also make me so mad I think I am going to lose it! But no matter how insane she drives me, I wouldn’t give up being her Mama for anything in this world!

(I must have really lost my damn mind today, because I just paid $56 for a pair of snow boots for her! They were totally cute with free overnight shipping from Zappos.com. And they are lavender. Of course! And it’s Christmas…)

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Category: The Diva

About the Author ()

I'm Shan and I 'm the creator of The Asylum and a magnet for The Free Range Stupid™. I'm a little nutty, a lot sarcastic and pretty damn smart. I am also a graphic designer, blog coder, virtual assistant, free lance writer and can whip you up a killer resume, media kit or press release that would make others green with envy. Go to Skewed Design Studios to check out my services. You won't be disappointed.

Comments (6)

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  1. Kristina P. says:

    Sounds like she’s picking things up from TV and radio!! Amy Winehouse!

  2. Shan says:

    Kristina,

    We actually have the Amy Winehouse CD. It is a good album, but I am kind of over her with all the crazy psycho bitch stuff she is pulling.

    She NEEDS to go to rehab. Yes! Yes! Yes!

  3. LadyStyx says:

    What a darling picture!
    LOL…some of the things kids say!!

  4. ChicagoLady says:

    I love the pogo stick comment. Up. Down. Up. Down. Like that. See? Bong. Bong. Bong.

    Kids can be very entertaining. Sometimes.

  5. Rae Ann says:

    Clearly your Diva and my Z are cut from the same cloth. My one wish for Christmas is cease fire on button pushing from my first born. Not gonna happen. But I can dream, can’t I?

    PS – I popped over from BSU. I love your masthead. Is that a picture of you?

  6. Shan says:

    Rae Ann,

    Well at least I am not alone in insanity caused by a child!! LOL

    Thank you for the compliment. I LOVE my header too! But, no it is not me in the picture (I wish!). I found it on the net somewhere. I worked VERY hard to find just the right pictures for my masthead.

    Thank you so much for noticing!

    Someday I will have to tell you the saga of my template…it’s complicated to say the least! Having to go through at least 4 designers just to get it almost where I want it…it’s been work, let me tell you!

    I hope you come back to visit again soon.

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