We Are Women…We Must Backstab

I am loyal to a fault. I have always tried to see the good in people…until they piss me off, then it’s on like Donkey Kong {Holy crap! Did I just type that? I’m losing it…} I actively seek out others with unique abilities & perspectives in an effort to broaden my own and learn something new. I want my daughter to learn that different doesn’t always mean bad.

We, as women, are supposed to help one another. We are supposed to unite and support each other. What the hell were all the equal rights/equal pay and bra burning protests for? Was it all merely symbolic? We are still stuck in that place, clawing on the backs of other women to get what we want. It’s juvenile and ridiculous!

I don’t agree with Gloria Steinem’s politics, but I do support her fight for equality for all women. All this backstabbing, jealousy, I will be your friend until something better comes along, how much leverage can I get out of you bullshit has to stop! We need to be united as one gender, regardless of our family, sexual, financial or religious status.

We should always be striving to change the minds of those who think women should be silent, barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen. We are Mothers, Aunts, Sisters, Daughters, Grandmothers, Entrepreneurs, Nurturers, Bloggers…this list goes on and on. And yet we still reject our uniqueness, morals and class in order to fit in with…with what? A bunch of people who would toss you away if it suits their needs that day? We need to come together. Screw all the other stuff. We all share the same hopes, fears and struggles, no matter how completely different we appear on the surface.

This is why I have such loyalty to CrackDot MomDot and Trisha. She believes, as I do, that we should be a community of women, united for a common goal. Now I am not going to get all Kum Ba Ya on you or anything, but I love that Trisha takes bullshit and drama from no one. I also love her snarkiness. Hell, I am The Queen of Snarky and Sarcasm. It is my life’s blood, so to speak. Many people don’t “get me” and take my sarcasm as either rudeness or thinking I am better than them. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have lost many potential friendships/relationships because a person was not willing to get to know the real me.

When someone says something intentionally mean to me, it hurts. Sometimes quite deeply. I want to be loved and accepted just as I am. I cannot fit into a mold someone has created for me. Nor would I want to. At the same time, and for as much as I love that I can’t be easily categorized, it is truly difficult to always feel as if you are never truly part of the group.

I think this dichotomy is present in all women, to some degree. However, we are still trying to be like everyone else and go along with the pack. We hide behind the group mentality and chew up and spit out whoever is the designated target that day. This is what we are teaching our daughters. It has to stop.

Why isn’t it OK to just be ourselves? Why do we, as women, feel the need to deny our true selves in order to be accepted? Children learn what they see. Young girls are especially vulnerable to peer pressure, self-esteem issues and bouts of depression from not fitting in {My Space Mom, anyone?}. Instead of celebrating our unique, special gifts as women, we try to be like someone else. What is this teaching our daughters?

The Net has become a virtual, viral High School Quad for women who have not yet matured past 10th grade. They hide behind a computer screen and spew their venom without mercy or fear of being exposed. Some are ballsy {or dumb} enough to practice this in the real world. But it all comes down to the same thing, women are fighting, tearing down and backstabbing other women out of pure jealousy in an effort to make themselves feel bigger and more powerful. They have no regard for anybody but themselves. We are teaching our daughters to only care about what’s good for them and no one else.

How can we successfully build a united community of women when this crap still persists?