I’m Rich, Beotches!!

[ 8 ] January 15, 2009 |

No, the Publisher’s Clearing House guy didn’t show up at my house, even though he keeps saying he’s coming. Something even better. And I didn’t even have to enter or anything! Awesome!!

British National Lottery Headquarters,
12 Bridge Street,
Staines Middlesex TW18 4TP,
United Kingdom.
Customer Service/Claims Department

Ref: :UK/NDU/9023118308/03
Batch: 074/05/ZY369

We happily announce to you the recent draw of the U.K NATIONAL LOTTERY,online
Sweepstakes International Program held on 2nd January 2009.Your e-mail address
attached to # Serial Number 5368/02 drew the lucky numbers: 01-14-21-3-35-48
and a bonus number of 24.You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum
of £590,930.00 (Five Hundred and Ninety Thousand Great British Pounds) in cash
credited to file KTU/9023118308/03.

NOTE:You are to reply to this email below to claim your prize.

Name: Mrs. Clara Washington
Email: uknl.mrsclarawashington@gmail.com

You are required to provide the following information for verification

1.Full Name:_______________________________
2.Full Contact Address:_______________________
7.Country of residence:_______________________
6.Tel :___________________________________

Congratulations once more and from all members and staff of this program.

Mr.David Brooke
Online Co-ordinator For (UKNLF).

Do these people really think we are going to fall for this crap? Really? That we are going to give our personal information to someone who can’t even use spell check? Not to mention that the U.K. uses the Euro as its form of currency, not the pound. A couple of months ago, I got an email from an Irish lawyer saying that Merv Griffin had left me 20 million dollars because I am his heir. WOW! That’s news to me.

I guess that means I should march myself down to his very expensive Palm Springs resort and demand my posh suite & room service for life, don’t you think? I am, after all, his only living relative and therefore owner of all his worldly goods. I do wonder how in the heck these people found my email address in the first place because I have a couple of email addy’s I have lost and would like to have back. The people that send these emails are evil and have way too much time on their hands. Kind of like Martha Stewart…

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Category: I Got Your Funny Right Here!, The Free Range Stupid, Thoughts

About the Author ()

I'm Shan and I 'm the creator of The Asylum and a magnet for The Free Range Stupid™. I'm a little nutty, a lot sarcastic and pretty damn smart. I am also a graphic designer, blog coder, virtual assistant, free lance writer and can whip you up a killer resume, media kit or press release that would make others green with envy. Go to Skewed Design Studios to check out my services. You won't be disappointed.

Comments (8)

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  1. Me says:

    What is even worse is the hundreds of people every day that get sucked into this scam!

  2. What is even worse is the hundreds of people every day that get sucked into this scam!

  3. LadyStyx says:

    I get on an average 1 a DAY of those and at least one “help me move my money to the US” from a soldier or someone in Africa…

  4. I get several a day! From as far away as the U.K., Africa and the Benin Republic (wherever that is). I love the ones from a child who has no family cause her parents died, but her dad left her millions and I have to claim to be her relative so she can get at the money.

  5. DAMMIT!!

    I was totally going to post about this and all the other wonderful “goodies” I get in my spam folder.


  6. They should get original. Something like.”I am a spammer. Please send me some monies. My mother-in-law refuses to leave my house unless I pay for her weekly Botox sessions…..”

  7. Shan says:


    This stuff is rather funny, but I am always afraid the scammers have attached some Trojan Virus to it, so I am afraid to open them.

    One day I will respond in my snarky, smart ass way. I am sure they will enjoy that immensely!

    And Jeannie? Sorry! Great minds think alike!

  8. Kat says:

    I’m jealous – my “winners” come from Nepal, Hong Kong and China – no UK winners for me.

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